Craig Burke has attended travel volleyball tournaments since his daughters picked up the sport in middle school 9 years ago. He has spent a small fortune on hotel rooms, tournament fees, merchandise, gas, and neon everything. The prized possession after all this time is his “Volleyball Dad” bleacher chair. He won it at a raffle during the 2021 5th Grade Elite Skills Showcase that he was told his daughter HAD to go to, or she’d fall behind.
“I mean, she’s wearing a different color shirt,” Craig said, pointing across the court with a half-spilled coffee in hand. “But so is the referee. Is she the ref? Is she like… a goalie? Can she spike? I’ve been to 71 of these tournaments and nobody has given me a straight answer. God bless the people reffing. I wouldn’t officiate a travel volleyball tournament for all of Kind Midas’ silver.”
Craig’s brother-in-law, Rick Hendrix, has tried multiple times to explain. “I told him the libero is a defensive specialist, can’t attack above the net, but controls the back row. He nodded like he got it, and then asked me if she gets bonus points for wearing a different jersey. It’s hopeless.”
It All Started With The ‘Bump Buddies’
The controversy has escalated since Craig discovered his daughters’ team name, the Bump Buddies, wasn’t just a “cute little rec league” but a full-blown travel volleyball operation run by his sister — the so-called “Cool Aunt.”
“Craig, you can’t try to get the Bump Buddies labeled as a terrorist organization,” Rick said. “My wife coaches the team. She’s your sister.”
“Well they sure operate like one, Rick!” Craig snapped. “They tricked us with that cuddly name. Said it wouldn’t be expensive, said weekends wouldn’t be swallowed by volleyball. Now I’m spending every Saturday in a gym that smells like nacho cheese and Axe body spray. If that’s not psychological warfare, I don’t know what is.”
Tournament officials, when reached for comment, said they’d be happy to explain the libero position to Craig. “But only after he sits through another 9 years of pool play.”
Travel volleyball is not for the timid or the weak. You will sit in a gym and watch volleyball all day. You cannot complain, be tired, or pretend that money is an option. Is your credit card almost maxed out? Doesn’t matter. Get to the merch table, asswipe.
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